2000-08-16: Britain Sieged By Strange Madman

Pacific Edition

Britain Sieged By Strange Madman

Author: Markus the Lumberjack Published: August 16, 2000

There I was, calmly walking along the streets of Britain, when I heard some crazy fellow spouting off at the mouth about how he would rule Britain. I figured he was just another crazed warrior with his helm on too tight, thinking he was bigger than Our Liege. What I discovered a bit later surprised me.

The crazy chap continued walking around the bank ranting on and on about ruling Britain and how no one could possibly stop him. People just stared at him as though he was crazy, commenting his manner of dress and his wild red hair. I was still of the opinion that he was a complete loon, but there was something else about him. Something that reeked of evil.

It was only when the red-garbed madman realized that the citizens were not taking him seriously that he decided to do something about it. He walked over to the town cryer, looked her straight in the eye, and began screaming insanities at her, telling her to announce that he was going to the cemetery to form his army and that Britain would be his soon after. Soon after, the cryer started yelling that an undead army was forming at the Britain Cemetery and that warriors were needed.

I decided to see what would happen, so I headed to the cemetery shortly after Emil, as he called himself, left. Once I arrived at the cemetery, I stood and listened as Emil went on about how he would soon rule the world. At that moment, he began calling up undead soldiers : which is when I decided it would be best to get my hide away from the loon as quickly as possible. I immediately dove for the nearest cover, hiding in the branches of a tree as the battle ensued.

Emil's undead soldiers fought without care for themselves. The battle raged for quite some time. It began to look as though Emil was becoming annoyed with the warriors defeating his undead soldiers. He yelled that he would not fail and then began to change. It was a horrific sight to see, as his skin stretched and ripped apart. His back split open and two large wings were revealed. When what had once been Emil stood up, it was easy to see what he had become : a daemon of revolting proportions. That explained the sense of evil that I felt coming from the “man”.

The daemon continued to fight while summoning his undead soldiers. The battle raged on as bodies began to litter the ground. As more and more of the undead soldiers fell, the warriors turned their attention to the daemon. It wasn't long at all before the daemon was yelling once again that he would not be defeated, and that he would return. We have all heard that before. They come close once, so they think next time they’ll succeed. Once the daemon was vanquished, the warriors continued to slay the remaining undead soldiers.

This has been one day that I can safely say I will never forget. Perhaps a story to tell the grandkids someday though for today, I felt it necessary to send word of the events, so that the citizens of Britain will be ready if “Emil” returns again. For now, I must be getting back to the forests, as I have quite a few logs to gather.