View source for UO:2001-01-03: Thrill-Seeking Adventurers Defile The Fire Temple

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| shard = Napa Valley
| title = Thrill-Seeking Adventurers Defile The Fire Temple
| author = Cornelius the Farmer
| type = BNN
}}<div class="uofiction">

When a man clad in gold armor appeared at my farm and bought every animal I had on my land, I figured he was planning a feast or something. I couldn’t suspect that this unlikely purchase would lead me to the strangest thing I’ve ever seen in my life. 

The man called himself Decimus, and he had a large amount of cash ready to pay for the animals. He said they were meant for a special project he had been planning for several days. I was instructed to put the animals into a large pen. Decimus said he would magically transport them when he needed them. I did like he asked and put the animals into my largest pen. No sooner had I placed them all in the pen than Decimus began summoning them away! I guess I was too close to the pen because, just like that, in the blink of an eye, I found myself being teleported as well! 

Being a simple farmer with one wooden leg, I hid behind a pillar as soon as I appeared at Decimus’ destination. I recognized the location to be the evil temple on Fire Isle. All around me, warriors were slaying daemons and drakes. My livestock was still being teleported in and the fighting had the animals spooked real good. It was truly and odd scene. Decimus was running around keeping the daemons away from the cows, and mounted fighters were holding the steps of the temple. 

At first I thought these men and women meant to sacrifice the cows to some evil god, but when all the evil beasts were slain, they let the various farm animals roam the temple freely for a while. All that time the chickens, pigs, cows and goats made the kind of mess that only a group of well-fed farm animals can make. The smell of animal waste all over the temple combined with the smell of dead daemons was the worst smell I’ve ever encountered. It became clear that the adventures were engaged in a risky pranktheir goal the whole time was simply to battle back the daemons while the animals that Decimus had bought from me defiled the evil temple. After the battle, the brave group returned to Britain, and I managed to sneak back through their gate before it closed. 

The citizens of Britannia can rest a bit easier tonight knowing that the evil cults that frequent the Fire temple will have to give it a good washdown before they can carry out any of their depraved rituals next time! 
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